On Fatherhood!

They say, because God couldn’t be every where He created mother. And I say, that mother’s couldn’t​ do it all, so He created father.

We write so much about mothers and so less about fathers. That’s why  I am writing about fatherhood even before writing about motherhood.

During my pregnancy and after the dilivery there have been many pillars of support for me. They had taken great care of me, supporting me with all their heart. But my strongest and dependable support has undoubtedly been my husband.

Father

What husbands can do, for us women, is irreplaceable. They are there to bear our tantrums, crack funniest jokes, fulfill our wild cravings even at middle of the night, rush to doctors in emergency, cruise through our endless shopping, listen to our continuous rants, guide us and do all the wonderfull things, every single day.

Hero

It’s like they are holding us in their warm embrace, fighting the stormy world single handedly, not letting us feel anything.

Yes, there are always exceptions and I deeply pray for the unlucky women out there who miss all these things. But in essence, most men knowingly and unknowingly love to pamper their women, albeit in their unique way. Not necessarily always showing it.

Dads

Coming to back to the time I spent after my dilivery. My husband didn’t became a father in a day. It has been a journey taken in steps, right from the time I broke the blessed news, to the time we had our son in our arms. Like me, he too had to learn his lessons to be a father.

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Sometimes he faltered just like, but then he amended. Sometimes he lost his temper just like me, but then he calmed himself down. Sometimes he wanted to quit and give-up just like me, but then he straightened his kinks and tried once again. But like me he never completely gave up on being a new father.

He not only learned to be an amazing father, but also aced the feat of becoming the most wonderful husband, all over again.

The new role came with its unquie challenges like changing the nappies, waking all night and waking in the morning to go to office, handling my cranky and often depressed mood swings, sometimes cooking, preparing milk bottles in ditch of a sleepy night, getting up from cosy bed to sing a untuned lullaby, putting our son to sleep and all the small little things that every parents do for their children.

It will be amusing to write that my husband passed all the challenges of being father in flying colors, but just couldn’t achieve one hard target – cleaning the poop 💩! It’s kinda funny how everytime he comes running to me to do the dirty work.

To be truly honest, I consider myself a good mother only because my husband is a great father. And only because he is such an incredible father, can I boast to be at least a good mother.

Hero

My biggest strength as a mother lies because of him, and I can only thank him million and trillion times for this. I like most women, consider myself lucky. I feel humbled and blessed, as a mother because there is someone who has my back, always and all the time.

My words and appreciation for him can’t be written in words or measured in my prayers. It can only be fathomed by the​ depth of my feelings and happiest of my emotions.

Hero

So I dedicate this blog to the unsung and untold efforts put by all fathers day in and day out. Just like salt and sugar they add delicious taste to our life. Knowingly and unknowingly we enjoy their support, but fail to truly appreciate it. Their love and dedication help us go from strength to strength.

Capes

 

 

 

Love you dad yesterday, today, tomorrow, always and forever!

 

 



Nature is Inspiration 

If you lack serious inspiration then nature can be your constant fountain head. Just sit in the benevolent laps of nature and be inspired. 

I feel most estatic and happy in nature. And that’s why it is my most peaceful shelter when the batters of world tire me. The soul reaching silence of nature will energise your senses and nourish your creative ticks.

The colours of nature are so vast, so infinite that they will memorise you. The secrets, the depths and breaths of nature are unfathomable.

Regale in the amazement of the incomprehensible!

Rusting Away Your Memory!

It was a beautiful morning. The sky was blue, the birds sang and the fresh breeze flowed sweetly. I had just finished making a scrumptious breakfast for my family. 

Feeling elated at the days start I sat to peep through the morning news. Seeing me so well at ease my husband thought to nudge me playfully. He asked, “honey do you remember my mobile number”. Of course I do, I said. After all it has been so many years it must have been registered in my memory by now.

You see, that’s where I was wrong. At the spur of the moment I couldn’t recollect the number. I tried so hard to remember the number but sadly it didn’t quite come out. Blushed with embarrasment I gave him one of my innocent puppy look. He simply smirked and recited the number for me.

This made me think about how bad our memories have got. We have rusted the sharpness of our brain at the hands of technology. I am so used to my phone to dial my husband’s number that I have never made the effort to memorise it. 

And that’s bad not only because this is one number I should be having on my finger tips, but because I might find it handy in case something happens to my phone and I need to give him a call in emergency. 

I distinctly remember how my teacher never allowed us to use calculators to solves tough science and maths numericals. Then there were much better days when we had memorise lessons, tables, spellings, rythmes and so on.

And we memorised all of these things by heart. It was a such a great feeling to remember important dates and wish our friends on there special days. (Sighs) what glorious days were they!

But things have changed now. We are so dependent on technology that we need special reminders feeded into our smartphones to memorise our life’s important days and events. We need an autocorrect to check our spellings and grammar. Most of all we constantly  need Google to answer life’s intricate questions.

Our children need to learn to live without technology. Yes it is a boon but also a bane. We can’t let our memory power fade. Brain has enormous power, but it needs to be utilised. 

I have started believing in my memory and constantly challenge it. So that  it doesn’t dusts off in oblivion. You have to sharpen, brighten and lighten your memory – that to constantly to hone it. 

Let’s see how much I can achive. Atleast I will be able to answer my husband next time he asks for his mobile number. 

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After a Haitus!

It has been a haitus, a huge haitus. But all this while I was busy with some of life’s most precious moments and couldn’t miss them for anything.       

I haven’t been able to keep the pace but I don’t regret it. I have learnt that in order to move forward sometimes you need to stop, look around, calculate your options and take a step back. 

You don’t step back because you got afraid of the things that lie ahead, but simply because you are taking your time to gain your momentum back. So the next step you take has all the acceleration to push you way ahead. 

This time has been a valuable addition to my life. During this time I have been blessed with some of the happiest and the darkest memories. The happy ones made me believe that – miracles do happen.

And the dark ones made me almost give up my life, not ending it but plunging me into the shadows of despair and hopelessness.

But had it not been for this time I wouldn’t have understood the importance of light, hope and joy. I couldn’t have understood how life unveils secret lessons for you. I couldn’t have understood how a true love can create magic. I couldn’t have known that there are Angels and God out there watching over you and planning an elaborate scene. I couldn’t have understood the real meaning of destiny. 

That’s all for today!

And perhaps it’s not to late to say a very Happy New Year!

Take a good rest! 

Recognition is not always entirely yours

We all like recognition…a little bit of praise…all the ohs and the ahhs. There is no denying the fact that our ears crave for good words about our work, about ourselves and everything about us.  We might even fish them out sometimes :). We are all in tussle to get all the credit to ourselves and only ourselves.

But it is never right. The credit of doing, creating or inventing is never a single work. If you recount:

Every second something conspires to inspire

A while back, I was really engrossed in writing something particularly fancy. At least I thought it to be.  After all – my passion, concentration and creativity went into it.  But to my dismay that piece had gone astray. It had become bigger than my imagination. I could not curb the write-up into what I originally intended it to be.

Just then a bird came on my windowsill, chirped a while and flew sky high. That’s when an idea struck me and fanned my inspiration to work on the right path. I was finally able to chisel the write-up into what it should have been.

So the credit of being a ‘doer’ in this case goes to the bird and not me.  How we elaborate an idea is our prerogative. But it is also important to acknowledge the inspiration that lead to it.

I believe:

Newton’s discovery had a co-partner – The Apple

The search of spice inspired Columbus to discover America

A dream decoded the structure of Benzene…..and so forth.

We also need to develop the courage to acknowledge the bad. How many times a rude remark and a disgruntled scold lead you to work hard? Criticism sometimes inspires you like nothing else does because;

He has a right to criticize, who has a heart to help.

Alone Doesn’t Mean Lonely, There’s Always A Difference

There are many ways to live life.

Person A: “Poor chap, why does he stay alone, how lonely he must be”

Person B: “But he’s happy…I haven’t seen him complaining ever. He seems to be quite talkative when approached”

See that – the difference between being alone and lonely. Being talkative and a social darling is never a sign of having a better personality. There are people who like to talk less and still, there are people you prefer to stay in their own world. Unless they aren’t a complete social recluse, it would be wrong to treat introverts as lonely, shy good for nothing person. Often people consider introverts to be inferior to their extrovert counterparts. That would be totally wrong!

I read this list by Carl King and loved it because it strikes the cord at the right place. It sums the trials and tribulations an introvert faces, I have often observed

 10 myths about introverts via Carl King Creative:

Myth #1 – Introverts don’t like to talk.

This is not true. Introverts just don’t talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won’t shut up for days.

Myth #2 – Introverts are shy.

Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don’t interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. Don’t worry about being polite.

Myth #3 – Introverts are rude.

Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so Introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.

Myth #4 – Introverts don’t like people.

On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you’re in.

Myth #5 – Introverts don’t like to go out in public.

Nonsense. Introverts just don’t like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don’t need to be there for long to “get it.” They’re ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.

Myth #6 – Introverts always want to be alone.

Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don’t have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.

Myth #7 – Introverts are weird.

Introverts are often individualists. They don’t follow the crowd. They’d prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.

Myth #8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.

Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It’s not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it’s just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.

Myth #9 – Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun.

Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. Their brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Just look it up.

Myth #10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.

A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an Extrovert can learn in order to interact with Introverts. (Yes, I reversed these two terms on purpose to show you how biased our society is.) Introverts cannot “fix themselves” and deserve respect for their natural temperament and contributions to the human race. In fact, one study (Silverman, 1986) showed that the percentage of Introverts increases with IQ.

[Feature Image By MIR Brand] 

Cajoling Opinions To Work For Good

Opinions, otherwise given are rogue slayers of your actions. They are every bit of hindrance to anybody’s thoughts or actions. Aren’t they? Apparently, it might be a blunt audacity to ignore opinions. But somewhere deep down your heart quickly wants to respond “it would be better if you keep your opinions to yourself.”

But…there is a big clause. Sometimes you need to keep your iron heavy ego aside, make it light as a feather or sink it deep in ocean, listen to what opinions other hold or give, and then consider your actions. It hurts seriously bad, is lethal like a tiny paper cut and oozes blackest venom.

Opinions good or bad are thoughts that cause friction. When friction arises things start to transform – some gain momentum, some evolve, some leap forward and some change completely. But the end result is mostly good and works for the better.

Then again there is a caution to watch – the way your intellect handles opinions. Sometimes opinions are generated by lack of facts, lack of understanding for others, jealousy, intention to harm etc.  Your mind and intellect should be able to filter such opinions and throw them right away.

Life’s got many rules and one rule says…master the art of learning from the good and the bad.

 

[Image Credit – allopinionsarenotequal.com]